An Easy Job if You Know What You're Doing.

Unbelievably, that phrase is repeated with alarming frequency in job postings for freelancing writing. Loosely translated it means, "This is so incredibly easy I won't even consider paying you what you're worth". I struggle with the temptation to respond to these potential clients, who somehow, somewhere glommed onto this offensive idea. These are some of the responses I considered:

Then, you don't know what you're doing?
If it's so damn easy, why don't you do it yourself?
Don't you mean, "a pain-in-the-neck job that I don't want to do, but I don't want to pay for it either"?

Another horrific tendency is the client who wants to pay $1 per 400 word article. This is not a typo. Oh, and they want all original content that will pass copyscape. Don't forget that you have to research the topic thoroughly and each of the 50 articles that you will be providing for $50 must be completely different. No problem!

One more trend that is always good for a laugh is a post like this one (this is an actual posting):

Creative Writing - articles I will provide topics


What the hell does this mean? How many articles? How long does each article need to be? Is it about something I know or will I have to research? The worst part about this kind of posting is that writers bid on them. With no clarification whatsoever, 12 people bid on the job. I'm baffled.

I actually admire those who, in their postings, say that they don't really care about quality. As long as it is stuffed with keywords, they are happy. They want cheap work and they are willing to pay crap money for it. Personally, I'm not willing to provide it, but that's just me.